Needed to write this...

Whoa it's been almost a year since I wrote my last post. I don't feel like writing anymore and have been bit busy this year. Apart from that today is one of those days which makes me wonder whether I could have lived my life if this date was just another entry in calendar. I think maybe yes ... maybe no.. I don't know. It has been 5 years now and still it is as fresh in my memory as if it happened yesterday. A lot has changed in the 5 years and I wish I could go back in time and correct my mistakes[I mean who doesn't want to right?] however it is not easy and as I understand impossible by any other means to make it right. Only thing I can do is wait... wait for things to settle down or ... for me to end. First one is not in my hand but second one.. I could end myself... however I have to think about the ones I will leave behind and as of now it seems I just can not do it. I feel there is nothing else for me to do... everything I ever wanted to achieve, no matter how crazy it was.. I have achieved everything and somehow I do not yearn anything except... naah I don't need anything. After so many years I am at peace. Somehow I keep going on, maybe I am waiting for things to take a U Turn and a happy ending or dunno... Anyways... this is to mark... 5th Of November. A very important day of my life... it was ... it is and it will always be. This is for you... only one... who loved me and whom I loved.